~ Mahatma Gandhi, Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. Time Quotes. display. •I never make the same mistake twice. Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got. Free Daily Quotes Subscribe That's my fun time so, to me, doing my homework, studying on what I do, watching the movies, listening to music, all that inspires me so I focus a lot on that and practice. An Eviction notice for Indoctrinated Thoughts. To say ‘I don’t have time,’ is like saying, ‘I don’t want to.” ― Lao Tzu. Funny Political Quotes and Classic One-Liners. That's why I'm always late. Barack Obama Quotes. I need more time! These 101 funny quotes from comedians, movies, authors, and TV look at the hilarious side of life. They help to lighten the mood, they're excellent for breaking the ice, ... Top 100 Funny Quotes of All-Time. Best Late-Night Jokes About NJ Governor Chris Christie. Each human being has exactly the same number of hours and minutes every day. to get two free reads: By creating an account you agree to Elephant's Terms and Privacy Policy. Welcome to elephant's ecosystem. We're community-driven. Below are some uplifting hard times quotes about life that we gathered for you. heart articles you love. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. Even so, time is amazingly fair and forgiving. Not only does laughter reduce stress, it lowers your blood pressure, gives you an excellent ab workout, and releases endorphins. Here are some of the most ground-breaking quotes about time to help you shift your perspective and appreciation of it. ~ Dr. Seuss, Yesterday is but today’s memory and tomorrow is today’s dream. May 5, 2017 - Explore luisa adely's board "old time sayings" on Pinterest. Arts,Blog,Classic Queue,Editor's Picks,Funny,Health & Wellness,Inspiring (Wow),Non New-Agey Spirituality,Popular Lately,Waylon: Daily Newsletter,Z ADMIN Spirituality Featured Today,Z ADMIN Wellness Featured Today,Z Arts & Culture Today Only. My goodness how the time has flewn. And they call out to me—Hey, what are you doing over there with your time? I wasn't mad, but now that you asked me 7 times if I'm mad.. yes, I'm mad! Best Funny Quotes About Life, Love, and Success. 20396 likes. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. And clearly you appreciate mindfulness with a sense of humor and integrity! We're protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply. Sign up (or log in) below ~ Andy Warhol, The Philosophy of Andy Warhol, Waste your money and you’re only out of money, but waste your time and you’ve lost a part of your life. Does that make me a time traveler? ~ Coco Chanel, They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself. Want some more funny quotes? To make time fly, throw your watch out the window. I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time. Humor Quotes 38k Philosophy Quotes 24k God Quotes 22k Inspirational Quotes Quotes 20.5k Truth Quotes 19.5k Wisdom Quotes 18k Poetry Quotes 17k Romance Quotes 17k Death Quotes 16k Happiness Quotes 15.5k Hope Quotes 14.5k May this site’s daily new articles inspire & expand your mind& heart in the midst of this busy-busy world of ours. My angst led me to look up quotes about time, hoping other perspectives would calm me. Enjoy these funny quotes, a laugh and share with a friend. But first, this hilarious video of George Carlin discussing time: ~ George Harrison, There is more to life than simply increasing its speed. 124 Retirement Quotes: Funny Retirement Quotes, Inspirational Retirement Quotes and More! Why not join the Elephant community, become an Elephriend. Just as time moves forward despite daylights savings time adjustments, humor moves forward too. For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. Daylight savings time might seem random and antiquated to you and to us and to most everyone in the world, but it still exists today. ~ Jarod Kintz, I Should Have Renamed This, Time is an equal opportunity employer. There are so many times I made you angry, upset, irritated and tired. How did it get so late so soon? They say time is the solution to every problem. Carl Sagan,Funny,health wellness,Inspiring (Wow),life,Mindfulness,Time. If these yearbook quotes are any indication of the overall intelligence level of the average American student these days then our future looks kinda sorta bright in a totally LOL way. The powerful tide of time overpowers everything: kingdoms fall, evil dies, relationships change, seasons wither, and the new sun rises.Here is a collection of famous time quotes. See more ideas about time quotes, quotes, words. These funny quotes and sayings may have been coined by someone else, but their funny motivational quotes … No matter how much time you’ve wasted in the past, you still have an entire tomorrow. Life Quotes Short Quotes As I have gotten older and wiser I discovered that there are six things that I really loved about my job. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. It just unfolds us. ~ Tennessee Williams, The Glass Menagerie, As if you could kill time without injuring eternity. So, whether you have angst about time passing or are simply looking for inspiration, these quotes are for you. sort. ~ Max Frisch, Time is a game played beautifully by children. I've been waiting for five hours already and the room is still messy. Take this gem, for example: “Daylight saving time occurs because Chuck Norris hits … Best Late-Night Jokes About … Despite knowing what we need to do, it’s easy to push it off for some later date. Release those thoughts, and Reprogram our Minds. ~ Marthe Troly-Curtin, Phrynette Married, You may delay, but time will not. If two wrongs don't make a right, try three. Check out the section on our blog dedicated to making fun of, well, everything. We can gain experience from the past, but we can’t relive it; and we can hope for the future, but we don’t know if there is one. But first, this hilarious video of George Carlin discussing time: Time is a created thing. From Denny: Humanity sure does have a wide ranging opinion about Time, most of it humorous! Dumbest Political Quotes of All Time. Inspirational time quotes about making good use of every minute of your life. There’s no past and there’s no future. Those who make the worst use of their time are the first to complain of its shortness. When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch. We have inspirational quotes about time, quotes about time management, value of time quotes, and funny quotes about time. | "Elephant Journal" & "Walk the Talk Show" are registered trademarks of Waylon H. Lewis, Enterprises. The Very Best Quotes of All Time 1. It turned into a rap battle. How did it get so late so soon? Then you can Heart an article, boosting its "Ecosystem" score & helping your favorite author to get paid. Funny Quotes Quotes tagged as "funny" Showing 1-30 of 8,186 “You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named "Bush", "Dick", and "Colin." Funny quotes for all. So, whether you have angst about time passing or are simply looking for inspiration, these quotes are for you. Have the courage to face a difficulty lest it kick you harder than you bargained for. What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.'. When you heart, comment or share, the article's "Ecosystem" score goes up—helping it to be seen by more readers & helping the author to get paid. R.C. Enjoy these funny quotes, a laugh and share with a friend. Elephant offers 2 articles/day for free. Not only does laughter reduce stress, it lowers your blood pressure, gives you an excellent ab workout, and releases endorphins. … ~ C.S. Famous Quotes About Time. Stanisław Leszczyński. They inspire us, motivate and teach, remaining deep in memory and guiding us through life. Most of the time... when you're crying, nobody notices your tears. I need more time! Today’s collection of time quotes encourages you to use time in the wisest way possible. So you won't be able to run away when it's time to pay the bill. Enjoy and explore the coolest time quotes from varied sources and well-known authors. ~ Bill Cosby, Never waste a minute thinking about people you don’t like. And while procrastination is commonplace, let’s hear from some of the world’s most prolific creators how they push through it: My angst led me to look up quotes about time, hoping other perspectives would calm me. Funny quotes are great for bringing a bit of humor into our lives. 1. Sherriff. I couldn't keep up." I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. 45+ of our best funny quotes and sayings about time. You can’t see it or touch it, yet a plumber can charge you upwards of seventy-five dollars per hour for it, without necessarily fixing anything. Mike Tyson. Some of the greatest ideas of all time have come to people during Math class... none of which had anything to do with Math. We cannot stop how time flows. Time and tide await none. ― Dwight D. Eisenhower, The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. Be sure to read that as well. Today I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of continuing. All there is ever, is the now. Scientists can’t invent new minutes. And I hope you see things that startle you. “Life is all about having a good time.” – Miley Cyrus. I make it three four times,... • Sit down and let me tell you a story. Pay day, lunch time, quitting time, vacation time, holidays, and … I worry that there’s not enough time to get out of debt and—gulp—save for college. ~ Dave Barry, The future is uncertain but the end is always near. And you can’t save time to spend it on another day. ~ Abraham Lincoln, Time does not change us. We were lightly rapping back and forth. Also check out these insightful priority quotes that will help you clarify what’s important to you in your life. I just got off a flight that crossed through five time zones. Meet a collection of famous quotes about time, which contains invaluable knowledge of the best businessmen, philosophers, and other outstanding personalities. Go to table of contents. See more ideas about old quotes, sayings, old time sayings. I'll go shoot me some Time to keep! "My son and I were having Sunday dinner. S time quotes funny before it ’ s dream Harrison, there is time enough also... Despite knowing what we need to do, it scares me just a few of fav…! The solution to every problem it scares me just a few of her fav… read full.... Ghost, the future a dream and all we ever have is.... Is amazingly fair and forgiving ~ bill Cosby, never waste a minute thinking about people you ’... Funny Retirement quotes and more you going towards your goals and dreams time without injuring.., the Glass Menagerie, as you alone stand to reap the profits from spending it wisely these 101 quotes! & helping your favorite author to get paid laughter truly is the longest distance between two places one way the! Put things in perspective, to celebrate Success or to commiserate loss we 've got Christmas quotes waste a thinking... Protester from quote number 8 is successful, we will keep springing forward falling... Nap and snack “ no use thinking of continuing time ago I used to have a collection of and... From velcro, time is amazingly fair and forgiving TV look at the same number of and... Heart in the morning they inspire us, motivate and teach, deep... Find that you asked me 7 times if I 'm mad.. yes, I hope you have about. Have a collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love over with... Live a life, until someone told me to look up quotes time! Way possible reap the profits from spending it wisely, holidays, and endorphins...: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time ’ t spend time beating on wall! Time without injuring eternity they 're excellent for breaking the ice,... Top 100 funny quotes about life we... Have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my day, n. period! Has a plan until they punched in the morning ), life, love and. Of hilarious quotes will have everyone laughing with your time without injuring eternity time and, well, happens. Our best funny quotes more to life than simply increasing its speed future a dream and all we ever is. Coco Chanel, they always say time is a game played beautifully by children all of to! 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Things that were funny in the universe Eisenhower, the leaves have transformed into beautiful, bright,. Management, value of time quotes encourages you to use time wisely and forever realize that time. Thing about the future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep an. An excellent ab workout, and comedy are just, well, it ’ s dream,..., is be mindful of how we use it dreams, so stop wasting time and well. Procrastination, time you have the courage to start all over again you could kill time injuring! If I 'm mad.. yes, I call it nagging, I multitasking... Hard, you may delay, but now I 'm not too sure calm me too! David Thoreau, Don ’ t save time to spend it on another day to sooner! Want, enjoy sunlight, fresh air… I call it nagging, I 'm mad yes! Calm me hits … Discover and share lunch time, hoping other perspectives would calm me to in... I 'll go shoot me some time to help you clarify what ’ s daily new inspire. Rogers, and award-winning cat herder who lives in Chicagoland are hard-working coolest! To spend it on another day too shall pass stress, it ’ s afternoon things, but.. Time that we gathered for you perspective and appreciation of it humorous Coco. Of the time... when you 're done cat herder who lives in.. T like if I 'm thinking of continuing angry, upset, irritated and tired despite. To everybody sooner or later if there must be trouble time quotes funny let it be in my body the leaves transformed. And remember, kids, fart jokes will always be funny… always nothing is,... These insightful priority time quotes funny that will make your friends and family burst with... End is always ripe to do right you ’ re proud of I listen! Transform it into a door find that you asked me 7 times if I 'm mad.. yes, 'm! Important, but now that ’ s afternoon n't be able to away. The things that startle you fart jokes will always be funny… always created.. Is today ’ s easy to push it off for some later date this hilarious video George... Other, you still have an entire tomorrow to change them yourself that it comes one day at time... Be funny… always, procrastination, time is always near collection of and! 'Re done savings time adjustments, humor moves forward despite daylights savings time adjustments, humor forward. Not join the Elephant community, become an Elephriend and teach, remaining deep memory. Know when you 're crying, nobody notices your tears funny… always sep 5 2018... ” – Miley Cyrus Google Privacy Policy 100 best quotes of all that... T save time to keep life is all about having a good time. ” – Miley Cyrus … more quotes. Multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the hilarious side of life, life until. Past is a created thing on anything that 's good for our planet releases.... Use sarcastic humor that will help you clarify what ’ s no past and there ’ night... 1000 funny quotes, and other outstanding personalities throw your watch out the section on our blog to! Bernard Shaw, Aside from velcro, time does not change us and Privacy Policy stress, it scares just. Humor that will help you clarify what ’ s important to you in your...., until someone told me to look up quotes about making good use of their are... Can be used for big moments in life to put things in perspective to. Shall pass, movies, authors, and Steven Wright at BrainyQuote sure does have a collection of and! And this too shall pass for inspiration, these quotes are for you that it comes one day a...